Wednesday, Jul. 01, 2009

Marriage Minute: Believe It or Not

Monica and I never cease to be amazed at how little preparation ( and "ongoing education" ) folks engage in with regard to their marriage.

We prepare more for a driver's license than we do marriage. No wonder over 50 percent of CHRISTIAN marriages fail. We bring our issues - broken places in our hearts that need healing. Add to those, the "normal" stresses and challenges of marriage, and before too long, we have given up. Oh, we stay together, but make no mistake - we are glorified roommates.

A pastor friend of mine once said, " all marriage problems are just two peoples' woundedness rubbing up against each other; heal the personal wounds, and the marriage 'problems' go away." What I brought to our marriage was the belief that I was un-loveable. I came to believe this about myself because my mom had died at age 9 and my alcoholic abusive father abandoned my brother and I. Although I met Christ in a foster home, I carried deep seated beliefs that I was unloveable; I never allowed Jesus into those deeply etched broken places in my heart, to speak to me HIS truth - that " I am my beloved's and his desire is for me." ( Song of Soloman 7:10) . When I began to really believe that God loved me, everything changed.

I believe the biggest challenge facing Christians, and therefore marriages, is wrapping our hearts and minds around how much God loves us. John 17:22-23 records Jesus praying to the father, " I have given them the glory you gave to me, that they may be one as we are one. With me in them and you in me, may they be so perfected in unity that the world will recognize that it was you who sent me, and that you have loved them as as you have loved me." God loves us as much as He loves Jesus ! When we allow that truth to seep into our hearts, our broken places are healed, and we are free to love God, our spouse, and others.

Join us this fall on Wednesday nights for "Couples' Connection", a marriage class at Cornerstone Community Church. Also listen to the radio version of "Marriage Minute" on KAMB 101.5 FM, Mondays at 9:50am, beginning July 6th.